Queering the American Dream

The chalky remains of a life cut short filled my hands as I watched my faith slip through the cracks between my fingers. As ordained clergy, I've officiated a lot of funerals. For fourteen years, I shaped burnt ash across congregants' foreheads each year before Lent and reminded them that we all come from dust. To dust we shall return. This day, as I officiated my little brother's funeral, I held the ashes of his body in my bare hands. I'd never done this with anyone else's remains, but I wanted to somehow touch him one last time, to feel his pain and let his torment fall through my fingers, as fragments of his bones clung to my palms. Duster to dust. Computer duster killed my brother. I stood before the folding chairs of family with swipes of my brother's remains smudged across my black dress, as though I had been teaching a thorough lesson at the blackboard of my university classroom and mistakenly leaned against the chalk. A colander was perched atop my head. This was, indeed, comical. And intentional. You see, my little brother, Carl, was not religious. In fact, he was anti-religious. He embodied his disdain for organized religion with a profound love for the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. As I am a professor of religion, Carl could hold his own with me when discussing world religions, and I would dare say he knew more about Christian history, scripture, and theology than most people who profess the faith. This was in large part because my brother was an intelligent critical thinker, and in small part because he deplored the way most churches treated his queer big sister. But organized religions were not for Carl, so he opted to study and parody them with the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Started as a protest against right-wing discrimination, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster holds a light-hearted view of religion and jokingly calls its adherents "pastafarians." So, the colander is a highly esteemed satirical symbol. You know. Because it drains pasta. In addition to omitting any references to god throughout his funeral, I also opted to wear the colander on my head, passing it around whenever anyone wanted to share a memory or a word of comfort. This probably seems blasphemous to many. As an ordained clergywoman, I think it's pretty damn funny. I needed the levity. Other clergy colleagues offered to officiate, knowing how emotional I would be and seeking to provide me with the care I was extending to so many others. But I couldn't trust anyone with the words and gestures, rituals and lamentations for honoring my little brother. Trembling under March clouds, the vineyard behind me, farmhouse beside me, family before me, and shiny metal colander rattling above me, I couldn't help but wonder, "How in the hell did we get here? And how can we survive this?" How'd We Get Here?

Queering the American Dream (Ministry from the Margins)

Yarber, Angela

Parenting & Relationships

Tehom Center Publishing

During Covid, Dr. Terri L. Russ took up the practice of intuitive painting and quickly found herself pondering the question - what would your life look like if you embraced your creativity. The answer to that question led her to the realization that she was only half-living her life and always longing for something more, her soul. She started a reflective journey of moving past her fears of stepping out of her professional career box and into her compassionate creativity. The end result is a series of meditations that are part reflection, part inspiration, part feminist rant with touches of angst, anger, and humor sprinkled throughout. 
Dr. Terri L. Russ, Esquire is living her best "Renaissance Man" life as an artist, author, advocate, enigma, and Diva Dog momma. She has spent over two decades as a professor in higher education and has also worked with hundreds of women as a coach and mentor. She has created the Compassionate Creativity approach to life to help others fill the canvases of their lives with the passion of their dreams. Learn more at: terrilruss.com 
Advanced Praise for Cultivating Compassion, Creating Self 
"This book will change lives. Dr. Russ' stories make her a relatable companion, which is important as her meditations awaken our creativity. Transformation beckons, and we are grateful for Dr. Russ' encouraging voice at our side. Together, author and reader journey into deeper self knowledge and more vibrant self expression, creating art works and artful lives." -Chip Roush, M. Div. 
"Terri Russ' new book is captivating from the start. She has the knack for confiding in the reader that brings you into her circle of compassion and exudes faith in you to be compassionate with yourself as you embrace your creative. What's more, she has inspired me to approach some of my own projects without the constraints of the 'shoulds' as an academic, inspired early in the book, "Immediately I realized how much of myself I was missing by constantly suppressing my creativity behind my "real" work." Her process of learning to trust and empower herself for that which fills her soul is awe-inspiring and reminds us all to not give up on reaching for our joy, no matter in what phase of our careers and patterns of 'shoulds' we find ourselves." 
-Jennifer S Kramer, PhD, Associate Professor of Strategic Communication Studies, College of St. Benedict and St. John's University 
"This book is a must read for anyone who has ever dreamed of becoming an artist or to even just dare to call themselves creative. I was captivated from the start as Terri spoke about how she'd put her creativity aside in pursuit of a 'worthwhile' career. Like many of us (myself included) she let go of her artistic ambitions to follow someone elses version of her life, only to discover that creativity was never going to let her go. 
This is a comprehensive guide to living a creative life without the need to go to art school. It's honest and raw with the bonus that you can start the book at any point and still feel like you are on your unique journey to discovering your creative goddess energy. 
Having coached hundreds of women to let go of perfectionism, comparison and the outcome of the creative process, I can see so many of my clients' journeys in the words of this book. I'll definitely be recommending it to all of my current and future clients. I'll also be keeping a copy in my studio for those times when I need to re-remember the lessons contained in these pages myself." 
-Angela Murray, Intuitive Artist & Intentional Creative Coach

Cultivating Compassion, Creating Self

Self-Help

Russ, Terri L

Success

While at a gaming convention with her fiance, Samantha spends her days struggling with anxiety and insecurity. In the evenings, she is transported to a nightmarish landscape of panic-eyed people. In order to survive in both worlds, she must confront herself, her past, and her faith in others. With a chorus of voices echoing in her head, Samantha will discover the creative ways her mind dealt with the precarious world around her. 
____________ 
Camilla Shelley is an avid reader and an ardent advocate for mental health. Her debut novel, Panic Eyes, is based on her own experiences with dissociative identity disorder. Camilla lives just outside of Austin, TX, with her partner and their three mischievous cats. 
_________________ 
A compelling force of literature, Camilla Shelley has crafted a window into how the effects of a challenging inner reality can so easily and completely spill into the mannerisms, decisions, and relationships of our external world. Panic Eyes is a gripping and vulnerable narrative that will leave you in a kaleidoscope of compassion, intrigue, and wonder. 
- Mo Trout, Community Wellness Advocate 
Shelley has masterfully revealed the inner world of Dissociative Identity Disorder through the imagery of dreams. With breathtaking vulnerability and riveting storytelling, Shelley has crafted an invaluable resource for mental health professionals, those who have experienced complex trauma, and anyone interested in understanding the amazing creativity of the brain. As a therapist for 30 years, I cannot wait to share this page turning masterpiece with clients and colleagues alike. 
-Jill Steward, LCSW

Panic Eyes

Shelley, Camilla

Literature & Fiction

"I'm not religious; I'm spiritual." How many times have you heard this, or even said it yourself?Reclaiming Faith is a tender yet practical approach to uniting the spirituality you love with the religion you've lost. After surviving marital abuse and religious discrimination, Clifford reconciled his sexual and spiritual identities and now vulnerably invites you to learn from his journey. Modelled after his own process of healing, Clifford teaches you how to: - Read the Bible as though you live among its pages- Worship as though "church" was a personal sanctuary, not a public one- Look inside yourself as though God actually dwells there (because God does!) _____________Trent Clifford (MDiv) is a poet, speaker, spiritual director, abuse survivor, proclaimer of truth, and reclaimer of faith. As a writer and spiritual director, he seeks to provide a ministry of rest for people in the midst of processing their trauma, a ministry of inspiration for those who are looking to enter back into the faith that hurt them, and a ministry of imagination for anyone who needs to look upon God through new eyes. ______________ "With vulnerability, clarity, and courage, Trent reclaims his life and his faith. Reclamation stands out as one of the few brave voices speaking honestly about domestic abuse from the perspective of a gay male survivor, while also giving voice to a gay man's surprising love story with Christianity. Though written as a memoir, this delightful book also reads like a love letter to anyone who has been hurt or cast aside by church and longs to find belonging again."-Rev. Kyndall Rae Rothaus, Author of Thy Queendom Come and Founder of Nevertheless She Preached "It seems an incredible feat for a first book to have such a well-defined and authentic voice. He draws us into a depth of intimacy that quickly made me start protecting my reading time from interruptions." -Rev. Erin Conaway, Pastor of Seventh and James Baptist Church "Clifford details the journey of loving God and the Church alongside the searing pain of feeling distanced from the faith held dear. He weaves together this significant loss with the expectation of a brighter future - one where his whole self is engulfed by the healing embrace of a warmer, bolder, broader faith." -Rev. Geneece Goertzen, Author of Taking It Seriously: A Faith Leader's Guide to Domestic Violence and Founder of Hope.Rise.Thrive

Reclaiming Faith

Clifford, Trent

Biographies & Memoirs

The Gospels introduce a woman suffering for many years, who is healed after touching the frayed hem of Jesus' garment. Unraveling, introduces another individual's journey from shame and suffering to wholeness. These 21 pieces, mostly poems, speak truth to the undeniable ways church heals and the unholy ways church harms. Curated in liturgical seasons, Rebecca's words will break your heart and fill it as her poetry weaves together an experience of answering a call to ministry in The United Methodist Church, pursuing ordination, embracing her queer sexuality, and making the unbelievably difficult and amazingly liberating decision to walk away. Her story leads us to question if healing energy flows from garments or from the unraveling of power and tradition. Is it faith that makes us well or a desire to claim our belovedness and live authentically?\nRebecca Wilson is a queer poet and storyteller weaving life experiences with scripture and spirituality. 10 Camels is Rebecca's offering, turning words into water through writing and speaking. With gentle grace and prophetic honesty, she invites others into a story of finding belonging and facing rejection in the church. She is uniquely gifted at drawing people together, creating space for transformation, and stirring deep reflection on faith, community, and living water. www.10camels.com 
______________\n"Rebecca Wilson is no ordinary poet - she boldly disrupts and reconstructs worn theological concepts, Bible stories and images making them come alive. Excavating pain and betrayal, and also claiming new freedom, healing and hope, she draws us into her story with an artistry that is revelatory and redeeming." -Rev. Dr. Nancy Wilson, The Senior Pastor of SunCoast MCC and the former global Moderator of Metropolitan Community Churches 
"Rebecca Wilson's powerful and beautiful collection of poems invites the reader to bear witness, as she shares a most intimate journey of coming out to the powers that be in The United Methodist Church and of coming home to herself. It is a costly journey, filled with pain and grief, yet ultimately a hopeful one as her truth-telling enables her to weave into creation a more integrated, holy, and whole self." -Bishop Karen P. Oliveto, Mountain Sky Episcopal Area of the United Methodist Church\n"As a professor who has long taught the liturgical year as a testament to human yearning, I experience this collection as incredibly powerful as Rebecca Wilson frames her image-and-emotion-rich expression into the seasons of yearning, knowing, lamenting, and ultimately, celebrating. It is a witness to the holy journey of call and loss and re-call of sacred personhood. While specific to her ministerial and denominational journey, anyone who has felt the sting of rejection will find catharsis and hope in these pages." - Marcia McFee, PhD

Unraveling

Wilson, Rebecca

The Queen of the South and Mother of the House of Sugarbaker, Miss Terra Cotta Sugarbaker, has been the Executive Director of Atlanta Drag Story Hour since 2017. Her work has received global acclaim as part of an international movement seeking to share a love of reading through a lens of diversity and inclusion. When not pursuing world peace, she is interested in world domination. Her motto is "Reading Books & Serving Looks!"\n"Everyone needs someone to cheer us on, but there's no voice more powerful than our own. Miss Terra Cotta Sugarbaker helps us speak up and stand out with this fierce collection of affirmations so you always have the words to slay the day!" 
--Flamy Grant, Billboard-charting singer-songwriter and drag queen\nIn a world that too often wants us to dim our lights, Miss Terra Cotta Sugarbaker encourages us all to shine as our brightest selves. Whether you need a pick-me up, a pre-loaded comeback, or an attitude makeover, her heartfelt quips (and gorgeous glamour shots) are a fabulous way to slay your day! 
- Lil Miss Hot Mess, author of The Hips on the Drag Queen Go Swish, Swish, Swish and If You're a Drag Queen and You Know It

AffirSLAYtions

Humor & Entertainment

Sugarbaker, Terra Cotta

Humor

Faye Collins must decide to confront or forgive the teacher who sexually abused her when she was 17. When Faye sued Aquinas Prep Catholic High School and her accused abuser, Doctor Edward Vogel, the Catholic Church controlled the story with a puppeteer's smooth finesse. Twenty years later, as a high school administrator and Catholic mother of three, Faye is shaping a new generation of teens who confront abounding trauma. When she finds out that Doctor Vogel has cancer, Faye wonders if an encounter at the dying man's bedside can redeem them both. The journey will make Faye question her fundamental understanding of consent, accountability, and the importance of mercy.\nSarah Gray is a literary critic and English professor. Plumcake is her debut novel. Sarah studied Theology and Literature at the University of Notre Dame and earned her Doctorate in Postcolonial Irish Literature at the University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign. She grew up in Orange County, California, where she now resides with her husband and children.\n________________\nThere are no one-dimensional characters in Gray's novel: Plumcake sparks with the nuance of people persevering through impossible circumstances. The protagonist's biggest triumph is holding on to-and centering-a faith unsullied by humans. Faye's devotion, her sacred motherhood, and her life's work stand as testament to the resilience of those who endure the unwanted bond between abuser and survivor. 
-Elizabeth Savage, Professor and Dean of Westover Honors College, Lynchburg College\nGray's Plumcake is many things: A celebration of empathy, a lyrical exploration of the pain that springs from abuse, an encomium to the power of the human spirit, and the best book I read this year. 
-Jim Hansen, Professor of English and Film, University of Toronto\nPlumcake is a gripping tale about the inter-generational effects of sexual abuse and trauma. Told with sensitivities reminiscent of Nabokov, Gray deftly exposes the pathology of a predator while taking the reader on his survivor's complicated journey of loss and redemption. 
-Joelle Casteix, Author, Speaker, and Chair of the Board of Directors, Zero Abuse Project

Plumcake

Gray, Sarah

A seventy-three-year-old homeless refugee performs unnoticed magic and acts of quiet heroism. No one imagines that she will turn the world upside down. 
La Tortuga arrives in the surreal wreckage of Mexico City longing for just one thing; her own bed. But the concrete-skinned city is steeped in the pain of colonisation, exploitation and corruption. She must join its broken and weary inhabitants who persevere, as their culture's vivid colours and memories infuse them all with an urge to survive. 
As La Tortuga pursues her mission, an oppressive System of Monsters that criminalises migrants, limits housing access, and destroys forests, tries to stop her. Hostels vanish when she approaches them, and migrant shelters have shut down. She forms an unlikely friendship with a US tourist and encounters a scared, half-bald child who sees the internal maps of things using an old dentist's mirror. But when the tourist tries to help, he inadvertently places the child in grave danger. 
Nevertheless, La Tortuga must find and confront the System of Monsters before exhaustion extinguishes her magical abilities. 
The Eyes of the Earth lays bare the bones of the world, decodes injustice, unravels inequality, rescues dignity, and reveals the essence of humanity; its pains and potential.\n_________________

The Eyes of the Earth

Pearson, Tamara

Literary

Love Is The Why is a collection of poetry that explores how love is at the center of a queer minister's theology and her way of being in the world. The book contains three sections: one focused on loving our bodies as they are; one on connection with the divine feminine, and seeing ourselves in the holy and the holy in us; and one on social justice grounded in love. Through these poems, you can find the inspiration you need to embody love in the world.\nRev. Diana K. McLean is a Unitarian Universalist minister, a queer woman, a mother, and an activist. She lives in Minneapolis with her wife Rev. Shay MacKay, with whom she co-created the ministry of Sacred Depths (www.sacreddepths.com), with the mission of helping people deepen their connection with the divine within and beyond themselves through creativity and contemplation. They share their home with one dog, one cat, and many books.\nWe live in a world that often discourages curiosity and dismisses the redeeming power of love. "Love is the Why" is a beautiful subversive invitation to dive into our wonders and explore our own whys. Diana K. McLean gently guides the reader in exploring why and also how to love ourselves, our bodies, the divine, and justice for all creation. Love is the why and it is a gift to embrace and share with others. 
- Rebecca Wilson, Poet & Storyteller at 10 Camels. Author of Unraveling: Coming Out and Back Together.\nIn her first book of poetry, Love is the Why, Diana McLean, claims herself to be a "Minister ...reclaiming poet and will work to earn activist" yet her activism and poetry radiate on each page and poem with raw emotion and a call to the action of Love. As we, and she, enters middle age, she calls us to Love our bodies while allowing the guilt of the past to soften rather than simply forcing it away. We are the Divine Feminine and McLean's realization of this in her words strikes deep into each of us as we feel her words calling us to Love each body part, each archetype, each finger and wrinkle and stretch mark. Using this Love of self to become the activist, McLean further calls us to Love all those whose lives we can help and heal; from the immigrant child to the ones lost to a needless, unending war, to the very Earth Herself. 
- Kelly Christine, MFA

Love is the Why

McLean, Diana K

Poetry

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Business & Money

Business Development & Entrepreneurship

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