Late Love

Many women, and a minority of men, are deciding that ‘adequate’ marriages are inadequate. They are driving an explosion of ‘grey’ divorce and remarriage in the over-50s. With children departing into their own journeys and ever-longer lives stretching out ahead, more mature adults are leaping, unconventionally and aspirationally, at a last chance at love. Most of the existing literature discourages them. The dominant mantra of books, counselors and media is that ‘staying together’ is the superior, admirable choice. They insist that romantic dreams of great sex and soul mates are the Disney-esque yearnings of the naively immature. This book argues the contrary. Great relationships are not only attainable; they are a natural and admirable goal for ageing humans. And if your current mate isn’t interested in working with you to craft an ever-deeper and finer partnership, then it may be your mate that requires changing – not your dreams. As a gender expert, Avivah Wittenberg-Cox frames her reflections in the context of an unprecedented, millennial shift in gender relations. As women’s educational, social and economic empowerment increases, they continue to demand more for the world – and from it. This is true both at home and at work. Settling for anything less than mutually supportive, seductive and stretching relationships is so yesterday. As the number of late leavers and lovers swells, their thirst for more is redefining what relationships look like in a greying, gender-balanced world. And it looks pretty good. Many women, and a minority of men, are deciding that ‘adequate’ marriages are inadequate. They are driving an explosion of ‘grey’ divorce and remarriage in the over-50s. With children departing into their own journeys and ever-longer lives stretching out ahead, more mature adults are leaping, unconventionally and aspirationally, at a last chance at love. Most of the existing literature discourages them. The dominant mantra of books, counsellors and media is that ‘staying together’ is the superior, admirable choice. They insist that romantic dreams of great sex and soul mates are the Disney-esque yearnings of the naively immature. This book argues the contrary. Great relationships are not only attainable; they are a natural and admirable goal for ageing humans. And if your current mate isn’t interested in working with you to craft an ever-deeper and finer partnership, then it may be your mate that requires changing – not your dreams. As a gender expert, Avivah Wittenberg-Cox frames her reflections in the context of an unprecedented, millennial shift in gender relations. As women’s educational, social and economic empowerment increases, they continue to demand more for the world – and from it. This is true both at home and at work. Settling for anything less than mutually supportive, seductive and stretching relationships is so yesterday. As the number of late leavers and lovers swells, their thirst for more is redefining what relationships look like in a greying, gender-balanced world. And it looks pretty good.