Because of Annie: Unlocking the Mystery of Life After Death

Because of Annie is one of the most comprehensive "Caregiver" books on caring for a "Loved One"on the market today. Based on a well documented true story of my wife Annie's 30 month journey through a deadly blood cancer--multiple myeloma. This is a very personal story, and by design will educate the caregiver by delivering an On-The-Job training type environment.  The caregiver will learn things they couldn't possibly have known unless they were there. I will place the caregiver in the room with Annie allowing them to picture the setting, hear my voice, and learn from some of my mistakes and greatest triumphs. Question:  What would you do if your loved one was lying disabled in a hospital bed in the middle of the living room, and when you went over to the bed at 7:00 A.M. to get her/him dressed for the day, you suddenly realized that your loved one couldn't see, and had gone blind overnight. How would you handle that. The key word here is "Loved One." The story behind this event was ongoing for a couple of weeks, with the outcome always in doubt.  As a caregiver for a loved one, this one event will teach you so much, and educate you in a way that no book or educator could. An education through trauma may not be the norm, but you certainly won't forget the event, and just how much responsibility you have to the Loved One and the entire family. They're all counting on you to do the right thing. Because of Annie has many serious to critical events, and inside those events is many, many, smaller events that if not addressed prudently by the caregiver, all can be lost. When you're loved one is not in the care of the medical professionals, you're in charge, and in that regard the doctor is counting on you too.  As a caregiver, I can't over emphasize just how important you are. Yes there is doctors, family members and know it all's everywhere, however, please remember in the the pecking order you are the center of the wheel. You have a voice, so don't be shy. You will learn how to do all these things in Because of Annie. How do you fire a doctor? Don't make the mistake I made and use the word fire, the appropriate words are, "I would like a second opinion." That is so important.  Don't get angry with the doctors when you have a disagreement. You will learn how to negotiate, and that's very important to the loved one. In the beginning the doctor's may not say much to you, or do things to test you. Like call you at 10:00 P.M. pretending to check on the patient when what he/she really wants to know is what your doing in support of the patient. That's how you earn mutual respect, and it will make your care giving job so much easier. You'll learn how to do that too. As a caregiver the loved one looks for you to take charge of their life, even if they don't act like it. You can do that by controlling the illness and not letting it control you. It's not as hard as you think. Because of Annie will teach you that love, compassion, and laughter is truly some of the best medicine. Because of Annie is full of those sorts of emotions, even when we were navigating very troubled waters. Of course there is End-of-Life-Care. We didn't use hospice, as it wouldn't work for us. There is an entire chapter dedicated to the subject, that will enlighten you, and show you that for us there was a different way and perhaps a better way.