Mom, I Hate You! Children's Provocative Communication: What It Means and What to Do About It

“You Can’t Make Me!” “You’re Stupid!” “I Wish You Were Dead.”

From embarrassing public displays of defiance and snide remarks at the dinner table to shocking outbursts of hate and anger, children often communicate in ways that push the notion of freedom of expression way beyond acceptable boundaries. In Mom, I Hate You!, respected psychotherapist Don Fleming demonstrates that such behavior is a natural, necessary part of growing up and offers parents effective strategies for responding to provocative statements and establishing meaningful, mutually satisfying parent-child communications.
Dr. Fleming takes parents through these tactics step by step, including:

• Decoding the meaning behind children’s words
• Responding to the meaning, not the words
• Strategies for change—incentives and consequences
• Provocative communication and sibling rivalry
• Line-by-line examples

Dr. Fleming explains how to decode the emotional message behind a child’s seemingly rude, mean-spirited, or disrespectful words and helps parents evaluate their own habitual, often counterproductive reactions to specific situations and behavior patterns. Using realistic examples, he shows that parents can reduce antagonizing and aggressive confrontations while teaching their kids to express their emotions freely and honestly.