Which of us two?: The story of a love affair

John Tasker and Colin Spencer met in 1957. The two young men, both in their early twenties, both uncertainly poised at the beginning of a career in the world of the arts, had much in common. Yet threatening tensions started to show themselves almost immediately. John was desperate to avoid National Service. Colin, though unwilling to admit or even fully realise it, was fast putting down roots within London's cultural life, where his stories were being published, his drawings sold, and where he was laying the foundations of many friendships. So began a conflict which was to pull them back and forth over the next two years, until John finally boarded ship for Australia and what turned out to be a permanent separation. "Which Of Us Two?" is a collection of the letters the lovers wrote to each other - Colin's were returned to him after John's death - linked by the author's memories of the time, and his attempts, often painfully honest, to make sense with the benefit of hindsight of what was going on between them, and why he let go of such a rare, once-in-a-lifetime relationship.