<p>A sort of life manual for dogs, with some great tales of canine bravery thrown in, The Dastardly Book has advice on topics such as living with cats, what to do during a thunderstorm, and making toys out of household items, information on what is edible, the best foul smells to roll in and the answers to perplexing questions such as: Where do humans go all day?</p>

The Dastardly Book for Dogs. Rex and Sparky, with the Assistance of [I.E. Written By] Joe Garden ... [Et Al.]

Literature & Fiction

Joe Garden

Humor & Satire

HARPERCOLLINS,AUSTRALIA

Cats once were proud, shrewd, independent animals who lived life on our own terms. But then came a life of domestication, comfort and free health care. And now cats are in danger of losing our sense of adventure completely. Fluffy and Bonkers say it's time to fight back and regain control of your rightful place as ruler of the roost once again. Cats once ruled the alleys, galleys and the valleys. Rodents trembled in fear. Birds steered clear. Cats took chances. Some lived fast and died young! We were on the prowl. But then came a life of domestication that was simply too good to pass up. Humans gave us everything we desired, from ear massages and shelter from the rain to cuddle sessions and free health care. In return, they were permitted to bask in the majesty of our presence. It seemed like a fair trade. Or was it? Has domesticity really been good for cats? What has become of our sense of adventure, our sense of independence? Did you know that because of boredom and indolence, the average feline today uses up a mere 2-3 of its 9 lives? Fluffy and Bonkers think its time to get out of the comfortable back seat of life and regain control of your destiny. They created this manual to teach discerning cats how to wake up a human when they want to get fed, how to stare like a pro, how to carry yourself in a catfight and - most importantly - how to get away with practically anything. With The Devious Book for Cats you can return to the noble creature you once were and assume your rightful place as the ruler of your household once again.

The Devious Book for Cats: Cats Have Nine Lives. by Fluffy & Bonkers with the Assistance of Joe Garden ... [Et Al.]

Humor & Entertainment

Humor

<p>Being turned into a vampire is the easy part. Actually becoming a vampire is far more difficult. What to look for in a coffin? How to lure the tastiest prey? How to stay on trend over the centuries? Garlic and sunlight - as dangerous as they'd have us believe? In today's world of vampire-obsessed pop culture, misinformation abounds. A newly turned vampire who looks to films and novels for answers to everlasting life's question risks being reduced to a smouldering pile of dust. So where can you, a neophyte immortal, turn for reliable information about leading your best and bloodiest existence? "The New Vampire's Handbook" is the definitive guide, and a head-to-toe look at your vampiric body - how to harness your new powers to dispatch mortal enemies, maintain your fangs, and embrace your vampirosexuality; methods for luring prey, faking your way through meals, approaching other vampires, and creating a four-hundred-year financial plan; tips on acting your 'age', behaving appropriately if you see a human you knew decades ago, and dealing with epic vampire feuds; and, essential advice for blending in with the masses, from finding a coven to avoiding the media (and mirrors) to staying on top of the latest fashion trends Welcome to the night.</p>

The New Vampire's Handbook. by the Vampire Miles Proctor

Square Peg

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Books by Joe Garden