Being a Dad: The Stuff No One Told Me

Take a hilarious journey through fatherhood with Dale Alderman and his two young sons, Chase and Logan.Based on actual events that occurred over seven years, Dale presents a collection of funny stories including:Breast Pads and Nipple CreamHoney, I Shrunk My UnderpantsStinkerheadStop It, Quit It, Stop It, Quit ItThe Farmer Cuts the CheeseBefore he became a father, no one told Dale the stuff he really needed to know, like how to deal with a rampaging three-year-old at the circus, or how to corral two boys before they demolish a restaurant. From a Little League baseball game to a grade school field trip, Dale takes normal daily activities and turns them into wild escapades. Come on along and let Dale show you how much he loves Being A Dad.

Being A Dad: The Stuff No One Told Me

Humor & Entertainment

Alderman, Dale

Humor

iUniverse, Inc.

Actually, I'm a murder aficionado. You could even call me a homicide junkie.Most people have rather benign, run-of-the-mill phobias such as a fear of spiders, heights, or public speaking. But what happens when fear becomes so consuming that it seizes control of a person's life? Matt Curtis, a senior manager with a consulting company, is overwhelmed with self-doubt. His personal life is falling apart, and his job is like quicksand, threatening to swallow him at any moment. His ultimate fear, however, is being alone. And that fear has come to call on Curtis as a supernatural creature in the shape of a tall, slender man wearing an expensive black suit and answering to the name Lazarus Douleur. On a mission to terrorize Curtis, Douleur removes one woman after another from Curtis's life through a series of bizarre and brutal murders that leave police baffled and Curtis filled with grief, stricken with terror, and looking suspect.Curtis must decide whether he will stand idly by and let Douleur systematically dismantle his life-and kill innocent women in the process-or muster the courage to wrestle his fear and use it to his advantage.

SHADOW FACES

Literature & Fiction

Genre Fiction

iUniverse

Take a hilarious journey through fatherhood with Dale Alderman and his two young sons, Chase and Logan. Based on actual events that occurred over seven years, Dale presents a collection of funny stories including: Breast Pads and Nipple Cream Honey, I Shrunk My Underpants Stinkerhead Stop It, Quit It, Stop It, Quit It The Farmer Cuts the Cheese Before he became a father, no one told Dale the stuff he really needed to know, like how to deal with a rampaging three-year-old at the circus, or how to corral two boys before they demolish a restaurant.  From a Little League baseball game to a grade school field trip, Dale takes normal daily activities and turns them into wild escapades.  Come on along and let Dale show you how much he loves Being A Dad.

Parenting & Relationships

Family Relationships

In 1914, Jake O'Farrell is the last single man in Groom, Texas, and a malfunctioning train has forced Anne Denning and her sisters to stay in Groom until it can be fixed, Jake's mother tries to play matchmaker and chaos ensues.

Everyday Dad

Lasaria Creative Publishing

What would happen if a dog became a superhero? In this exciting middle grade adventure, Joe is a run-of-the-puppy-mill cocker spaniel who dreams of being special, but suffers with the curse of being average. He lives in the suburbs of Barksdale with his friends Elwood, a dopey mutt who looks like a genetic mishap, and Frank, a plump wiener dog. When the dogs devour heaping mounds of dog food that is laced with plutonium, their DNA evolves. Joe transforms into MegaDog, a superhero with a passion for funky music. Elwood mutates into Baywolf, a sleek black and white wolf with a hip-hop attitude, and Frank becomes a gadget guru. In a palatial penthouse in the Crump Tower, Mr. Wrinkles, a power-hungry shar-pei, and his assistant, Pavlov, a mastiff with a drooling problem, create dog collars that contain mind-control devices. Inciting a canine revolution, Mr. Wrinkles wreaks havoc across the country. MegaDog and Baywolf must stop Mr. Wrinkles before he takes over the world.

The Megadog Tales: Unleash The Power

Children's Books

Animals

A frightening development is sweeping the nation. Affecting the lives of millions of people, this travesty is eating away at the heart of our society. Rampaging through every community in our great country, this horrible epidemic must be stopped. Ladies, please, we are begging you. Just say no to big white panties. In this hilarious collection of essays about relationships, Dale Alderman explores the different viewpoints men and women have about each other. Although he has been with his wife, Starla, for over twenty years, Dale freely admits that he knows absolutely nothing about women and he has the stories to prove it including: Nothing Says I Love You Like a Leaf Blower, The Thingy Is Going Ggguuurrrgggg, I Want My HGTV, What Is That Smell, Ow, You Are On My Hair, With This Pre-nup I Thee Wed, My Eggs Are Rotting, Boys Do Not Tinkle, and Why Do Men Scratch. Ladies, if you have ever wondered what your man is really thinking, Dale will tell you. Guys, if your lady has ever left you confused and frustrated, you are not alone. Dale has been there, too. To strengthen your relationship, sit on the couch with your soul mate, share a nice box of wine, and laugh out loud at Big White Panties. Dale Alderman lives in Chantilly, Virginia with his wife, Starla, and two sons, Chase and Logan. An award-winning author, Dale has appeared on FOX &amp; Friends on the FOX News Channel and has appeared on many nationally syndicated radio shows. Dale is the author of Everyday Dad, a collection of funny stories about fatherhood. He is also the author of The MegaDog Tales, a middle grade adventure about a cocker spaniel that becomes a superhero.

Big White Panties

The funky canine crimefighters, MegaDog and Baywolf, are back in action with another exciting adventure. On the tropical island of OomPoppaMowMow, King Scooter, also known as The Regal Beagle, has a serious problem. A volcano, Mount Blowachunka, will soon erupt and destroy the island paradise. There is no way to stop it. But that is not all. On a group of nearby islands, three more volcanoes, Mount Crackalittletoe, Mount OoogaChaka and Mount Wockawockawocka are set to explode. If all four volcanoes erupt at the same time, a cloud of volcanic ash will cover the Earth and block out the Sun, turning the planet into a gigantic sphere of ice. And if that is not enough, the canine crusaders have to battle the evil Queen Elvira, her wicked Doberman henchmen, Scratch and Sniff, and an angry monster made of pure lava. Can MegaDog and Baywolf stop the volcanoes before they erupt? How will the funky canines fight a beast made of molten lava? Will Queen Elvira destroy the heroes before they can save the world? Find out in this exciting middle grade adventure. Time to get funky! Dale Alderman lives in Chantilly, Virginia with his wife, Starla, and sons, Chase and Logan. For 19 years he worked as a marketing executive with major corporations, then he decided to get a real life and become a writer. An award-winning author, Dale has appeared on FOX & Friends on the FOX News Channel and has appeared on many nationally syndicated radio shows. He is the author of The MegaDog Tales: Unleash the Power, the first book in the MegaDog series. Stay tuned for more MegaDog adventures. In his spare time, Dale avoids going to the gym, feeds his addiction to chocolate, watches movies with his kids, and spoils his golden retriever, Gracie. For more information about Dale, go to www.lasariacreative.com.

The MegaDog Tales 2: The Regal Beagle

See the best price to sell, buy, or rent books by Alderman, Dale. BookScouter helps to compare book prices from 25+ online bookstores and 30+ buyback vendors with a single search.

Books by Alderman, Dale