Fur & Purr: The Funniest Things People Have Said about CATS (Quippery - The Funniest Things People Have Said)

Beautifully illustrated, with laugh-out-loud humor from Ellen DeGeneres • Dave Barry • The New Yorker • The Onion • Steve Martin • Drew Barrymore • Paula Poundstone • Steven Wright • George Carlin • Sarah Silverman • Rita Rudner • Rodney Dangerfield — and many more. Plus hilarious tweets from everyday folks.

• Drew Barrymore tells you about her greatest wish — "If I die before my cat, I want a few of my ashes put in his food so I can live inside him.”
• Dave Barry tells you what your cat really thinks about you — "They’re always watching you with that smartass cat expression and thinking, 'God, what a cementhead.’”
• Ellen DeGeneres asks: “Have you ever had a cat in heat? They just change on you. Once she was my kitten, my adorable little pet. Then, she’s a hooker.”
• The Onion describes “The Common Benefits of Cat Ownership” — "Cats are adept at defending your home from mouse-sized robbers.”
• Comedian Paula Poundstone tells you that "The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.”
• An ordinary citizen tweets about her deteriorating relationship with her cat: “My cat and I pass each other in the hall without even making eye contact. I think we both know we’re just living a lie now.”
• Writer Bud Herron offers practical tips on how to bath your cat — like, "Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body.”

Be sure to check out the companion book "FUR & GRRR — The Funniest Things People Have Said about DOGS"