The Breath of an Unfee'd Lawyer: Shakespeare on Lawyers and the Law

All The World's a Law Firm! Well, that isn't exactly what Shakespeare wrote, but it's amazing how much he did write that applies to lawyers and the law. And how much he wrote that can be applied to the legal world with a little help from creative category titles. Here are a few examples:
Judges, Influencing: A friend i' the court is better than a penny in purse. (2 Henry IV - V,i); Court System: `Tis like the forc'd gait of a shuffling nag. (1 Henry IV - III, i,); Oral Argument: He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of his argument. (Love's Labour's Lost - V, i); Law Student - Called On: I am so vexed, that every part about me quivers. (Romeo and Juliet - II,iv); Ambulance Chasing: Like greyhounds in tbe slips, straining upon the start. (Henry V - III, i).
Like dinosaurs in their heyday, lawyers haven't changed very much over the last four hundred years. Nor has the law. Nor, in fact, has humor. To buy or not to buy: that is the question.